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Permission to Speak

Someone requested a favor of me, a favor that did not align with what I was doing and would have inconvenienced me.


I was assured I could say NO… which I promptly did.


I felt some kind of way about the giving of permission to refuse. It wasn't required; I don't need permission from someone else to make decisions about what I do or don't do. But I recognized the acknowledgment by the other person (that I was perfectly within my rights to refuse the request) reflected a reality.


The truth is we often do things we don’t want to do because we give more weight to other’s feelings than our own. Or because e are afraid a refusal will somehow change the relationship. 


But what I’ve learned as I mature is you aren’t obligated to do things that don’t serve your greatest good, you aren’t required to say yes to anything not in your best interests, and you don’t need permission to say no.


“No” is a complete sentence.” ~ Anne Lamott