The fear that stops us doesn’t have to be about something big or super scary…sometimes we’re just afraid of offending or having a conversation that could turn into a confrontation.
I assumed a non-response to a follow up email about swapping a class with another instructor meant the answer was NO. In fact, the non-response was because the instructor did not see my follow up; I found out later, she had anticipated and planned for the swap but forgot to communicate with me.
A simple follow up text or phone call on my part could have yielded the answer I wanted, saved me some energy and allowed me to do what I wanted and needed to do.
I didn’t challenge the assumption so I didn’t get to do what I wanted. I have only myself to blame.
Inhale Affirmation, Exhale Assumption…
Inhale Surety, Exhale Speculation…
Inhale Confidence, Exhale Conjecture…
I was puzzled by a client’s insistence that she didn’t already have what she needed to gain the accreditation she wanted … that her credentials were too old…that she needed more proof of her qualifications.
When I challenged her, she assured me “they” wouldn’t accept her training or experience. She was so sure she even challenged my challenge to her false (as it turned out to be) assumption.
I understand where she was coming from. Her surety was based on her previous experience with and understanding of the dominant culture.
But she was allowing her assumptions about what “they” would or wouldn’t permit stop her from taking the first step to achieving her dreams. We can no longer do that.
“You were born into a society which spelled out with brutal clarity…that you were a worthless human being. You were not expected to aspire to excellence: you were expected to make peace with mediocrity.” ~ James Baldwin, The Fire Next Time
Inhale Facts, Exhale Assumptions…
Inhale Verification, Exhale Surety…
Inhale What We Want, Exhale What We Don’t Want…